Before we get down to crugness, I thought we might have some light pre-feature entertainment, like in the “olden days” (which of course I was not around for) when before the main feature at a theater they would show you a Looney Tunes cartoon. In Craigslist’s case this could be, for example, something like the following:
This just cracks me up. For one thing, in my neighborhood we’re more interested in getting rid of the coyotes than adding goats to the equation. And secondly, “neither is a leader”. (Well duh – everyone knows what lazy good-fer-nothin’ lag-behinds those pygmies and pygoras are.) Wethered, for the non-initiated, means the poor fellow is requested to present his application for employment sin cajones (does it sound less tragic if it’s in Spanish?!) I don’t know, a leader without balls — might be a fail…
And now on to our feature, also culled from the Craigslist Vermont page. Today’s crug is a matched set. If I say pre-formed blocks of chewing gum and spinach, in your mind’s eye do you see this?
I do. I am at odds with the description. I think “gorgeous” might be wrong over-zealous. I think it looks like pre-formed blocks of chewing gum and spinach. So, not gorgeous. (Or, so not gorgeous, depending on the decade/century of your birth.) The crug-seller’s consultant in me would like to suggest a re-write: “might be considered attractive by some unborn people”. They would like $380 dollars for it. OK. I guess. It’s not my cup of tea but it looks in good shape, and there are 3 (gargantuan) pieces of gum. They also stipulate that they want serious offers only and “Absolutely no scammers!”. I just blew milk out of my nose. Scammers beware – you won’t get your hands on this gorgeous seating arrangement. And if you try — we’ll wether you!
Th-th-th that’s all folks!